So you have been dating a guy or trying to have a relationship with a man who appears to be a classic commitment-phob. Because you have feelings for him you stick around until the very last drop of hope that he may change is gone. Then you finally decide that a man like him will never commit and move on… Only to find out a few months later he is engaged to another woman.
Did this ever happen to you? It did to me. I had a crush on a friend of mine who kept telling me repeatedly, “I don’t want to be in a relationship and I will never get married again!” Three months later he meets a woman from Australia and marries her practically within a month! Naturally, a typical thing for a woman would be to wonder, “Why wouldn’t he commit to me?” “What is it that she has that I don’t?” “What is wrong with me?” Ladies, relax, there is nothing wrong with you. Read this article and find out why this is happening.
Assuming this guy was honest when he told you he was crazy about you and he truly respects you and cares about you. He was just too afraid to commit to you. There was something about you that triggered his fear of intimacy and made him realize that he is not ready to give you the kind of relationship you want. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you did something wrong or that it was your fault. It just means that you probably challenged him too much in areas where he is not comfortable enough to be challenged. Most likely, what I think happened with this other woman was that she didn’t challenge him at all. That’s why being with her felt simpler and not as scary. Let me use this simple metaphor to describe what I mean. A person who is afraid of getting into water but wants to swim would most likely pick the safest and the smallest rock to jump off of.
Some people would say that this other woman was the right one for him. This is not always the case. Most likely his relationship with her felt a lot less complicated and being with her didn’t trigger his fear of intimacy as much as being with you. Both men and women chose to commit to a relationship when their desire to be with this person is greater than their fear of commitment. So what do you do when a man tells you he is not ready to commit to you? You walk away. I know this is hard, but it is the only way to attract a loving committed relationship you want and deserve, whether it would be with him or somebody else.
